“Wow, you’re amazing!” she said after we made love. “With qualities like that, you must drive dozens of women crazy.” “Not at all,” I said, “in fact I’m very choosy. I’m only into women I can really t ... Read full
A young Alabama man goes to a drug store and says to the pharmact: "I got a hot date tonight, an’ I need me some petection. How much is a pack a’ them rubbers gonna cost me?" The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of ... Read full
My mate is some buddy! He found a blind date for me that had so many gaps in her teeth, it looked like her tongue was in jail.
I was about to go to the cinema with my date, then I asked her, “Do you want to watch a horror?” She said, “No, thanks. I’m afraid of ghosts. Can we watch a chick flick instead?” I said, “Definitely not.” S ... Read full
Just kissing a girl on a night out is like buying a scratchcard and getting your money back….ye you’re getting something but it’s not what you want.
I recently broke up with my girlfriend and I was quite upset. My friend said, “Don’t worry mate, there’s plenty more fish in the sea.” I replied, “Yeah, but it’s not just the smell I miss.”
If you get a new job before you quit your old one, it’s considered responsible. But if you do that with your gf, it’s called “cheating.”
I was supposed to go on a date last night, and the girl I was meeting called me this morning, very upset that I didn’t show up. I said, “Sorry about that, I suffer from premature ejaculation.” “Well that’s very ... Read full
A young unmarried man goes onto a dating website to find the perfect woman. He enters his details and describes what he is looking for: “I want a genuine companion. She should be small and cute, should like aquatic spo ... Read full
Whenever I go on the pull, I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo and I think “here’s a bird who’s capable of making a decision she’ll regret in the future.”